The first page of my book? Probably not, but it's a start.. I've spent my life searching. It hasn't been a simple search, stubbornly focused on one thing and one thing only. For some years, during my brightest or darkest moments, I strained every muscle to see up past the stars or to peer down at the far boundaries of my soul. I've sought answers of all kinds, hunted meaning and hope and love, and have caught myself countless times chasing after fame, money, success, pleasure, and all those passing things we so dearly want to believe have value.
We all pass our days seeking things high and low, like some collective secret hobby. But in the step by step of life, I think we're all hoping and yearning for the Path to lead us through three things: the right place, the right profession, and the right person. Few of us find all three, at least not at the same time, but without at least one fewer still are strong enough to be content anyway, or lazy enough to be indifferent.This is the story of my dance with these three treasures, my personal jewels that only I can light up and that only have light for me. For years I tried to ignore them, wanting to live for something "higher." I really believed I could substitute beauty for belonging, means for meaning, or freedom for love, at least for a time. But as my search drove me on, through strange lands and stranger people, my road kept curving under my feet, leading me back to what I might never find but couldn't live without, leading me home. This is the story of how I slowly, in the hardest way possible, found out what really matters in life, and tried to let go of everything else.